Favorite Quote

"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."
-Randy Pausch


Monday, July 19, 2010

Stripped

A lot has happened and changed since my last blog entry. As it turns out, yes, it was a flare that started toward the end of January (with very mild symptoms), exacerbated during the food poisoning incident in May, and never really went away.

My last blog entry proved to be false. It wasn't just food poisoning that caused the awful reaction in May. It was food poisoning in conjunction with a flare. The flare was masked for three weeks after my Remicade Infusion, which left me (and my doc), to believe it was solely food poisoning. This proved false when I started having symptoms during my Hawaii vacation, exactly three weeks after my Infusion.

I have not blogged as it has taken me time to gather my emotions, thoughts, and spiritual being as a whole. This past month has been a real challenge on me physically, mentally and emotionally and has left me feeling stripped down to solely flesh and bone and thrown to the wolves for consumption. Thanks to supportive family and friends I am slowly starting to put the pieces back together.

As I figure out how to put this past month into words, I will leave you with an article written about me close to my one year remission date last November. The author of the article, David Longdon, was looking for cyclists with a unique story to tell. I was one that made the cut.


New blog entry coming soon...

6 comments:

A. Brown said...

Oh Emma, I don't have the words to say. You are a strong woman, and I know you will get through this. My prayers are with you and your family.

Rooster said...

Hope you get better soon!

Grandma said...

Emmmmmma...I hope you are doing better. Even thought I've been gone a lot this summer, I've enjoyed keeping up with your doings via FB. See you on the yoga mat, I hope. Also, you have a birthday coming up. Lunch? Movie? Spa treatment?

Grandma said...

PS Grandma is my other identity...for Isabella...to you it's Judy! (forgot about the Grandma thingy)

Zig said...

Emma...I just want to thank you for writing about your experiences. I think I am A LOT like you. I'm a cyclist. Type-A personality (I've been stubbornly trying to finish my PhD while fighting what has basically been a 3-year ongoing flare). Had the most amazing year of remission a few years ago after trying remicade...I was even healthy enough to run again and eventually do an Ironman that year. But shortly after the ironman, I started flaring again and it never really stopped. I 100% understand the mindf*ck of going from being healthy to being afraid of leaving the house and starving myself so I could make it to appointments accident-free. I know the first time I talked to someone who *really* understood what I was going through, I just broke down in sobs. I don't think I realized how alone I felt until I met someone who understood. Anyway, it sounds like you have an amazing support system...but if you need to talk to someone or have any questions about treatments (etc), please email me. szeigler@umd.edu

Zig said...

Oh and I'm even consider surgery myself. I have "indeterminate crohn's" which means they don't know if I have UC or Crohn's. My surgeon just got me in for an appointment at the Cleveland Clinic for a second opinion regarding which disease I actually have. If its UC, I'm going through with the j-pouch surgery. If its UC I'm going to wait awhile on the surgery. Please email if you want to compare surgery notes!