Going, Going, GONE!

Remember the ridiculous chia pet commercials?  Well, my furry kinda looks like a chia pet in this pic.  What he has on his back, ladies and gents, is a tray of wheatgrass!  I buy wheatgrass about once every five days, and drink at least two ounces a day.  It's not necessarily the best tasting stuff in the world BUT I feel it's necessary to help keep me in remission and stay healthy!  It has this little sweet taste to it, which makes me shudder.  I started drinking wheatgrass daily about two months ago.  Up to that point I only drank wheatgrass once every now and then.  I feel that wheatgrass will help keep me in remission now that I am off the 'riods.  You can check out the benefits of wheatgrass here, here, and here.  I'll have a "Wheatgrass 101" blog entry coming soon!

Yes, that's right, I'm now COMPLETELY OFF the prednisone.  I took my last steroid pill on Tuesday, and have been suffering from withdrawal symptoms since Wednesday evening.  It started with a pretty bad headache on Wednesday night which led to me not being able to sleep due to the severity of the headache.  On Thursday morning my headache was accompanied by nausea and fatigue. Today I have a faint headache, but the nausea and fatigue are gone.  I rode easy today, only for about 25 minutes, which isn't very much, but enough to keep me somewhat sane.  I have to keep riding to stay mentally, spiritually, and physically strong.  If, for some reason, I get sick again I'm going to keep riding, even if it's on the damn trainer.

It's going to be an interesting next couple of weeks as in the past I have always relapsed 3-6 weeks after coming off the 'roids.  Not this time though.  I'm stress free, my hubby will be home soon, I'm the strongest I've been since being diagnosed, I'm eating very well, I'm with my fam, and drinking at least 2 ounces of wheatgrass daily.  Oh, and I'm starting my Xango drink on Sunday too!  I feel confident that I won't relapse, but only time will tell.  

I'll keep y'all updated, but until then, enjoy this ridiculous commercial!

Happy Birthday Dear Doggie...

First off, I want to thank My Love Bug for coming through yet again!  The man is in the middle of nowhere (literally) and still managed to send me flowers (a flower cake to be exact) for my bday (which was Sunday).  I know you won't get to see this until you get home, but thank you Love Bug!

On Saturday we celebrated mine, Caesar's (my beast in the pic above) and my seester's dog Giovanni's birthdays. For those of you that think we're weird let me say that this is the FIRST time we've had a bday party for the dogs.  I'd say a good half of you have done the same thing but are too ashamed to admit it!  My sis also gave us all a shout out on her myspace page so check it out at: www.myspace.com/mariafrench

This is a pic of the doggie bday cake(simmer down PETA lovers, it's fake chocolate icing)!

On a more serious note, I tapered down to 5mg of prednisone on Tuesday.  This is a big deal because I will fully be off the 'roids next Tuesday (the 26th).  For the past two years I have been battling a vicious cycle with tapering because I have always relapsed 3-6 weeks after coming off the 'roids.  I am confident this will not happen again, but can definitely use your thoughts and prayers, so keep me in mind!  The vicious cycle that has occurred for the past two years will be broken this time, I know it!  I will keep my blog updated with my progress!  I think the lack of stress/being around family/riding my bike is going to help me break this vicious cycle.  I'm hoping for the best...

Lastly, here is a pic of Tom and myself after a painful ride early Tuesday morning.  I met Tom and Paul (Paul will be in a later pic I'm sure) last Tuesday while riding.  To make a long story short, I was riding by myself when Tom and Paul zoomed by.  Tom yelled at me to draft so I grabbed onto Paul's wheel (he was on Tom's wheel) and we cruised for a little while.  I met up with them this past Tuesday and they handed me my ass, but it was an awesome, painful ride!  Paul broke his crank while climbing so Tom and I had to pace-line back to get the car so Paul wouldn't cook in the hot AZ sun! Tom pushed me to my limits and I was able to see how strong I've gotten over the past two months(thanx for not letting me wuss out Tom!).  I was in some serious pain but know the only way to get faster is to suffer!  Thanx guys!  I look forward to our ride next Tuesday!  I wish I was staying in the area longer, Tom could seriously get me ready for race season next year.  

I also posted my first write up for the Vanderkitten Blog!  I'm SO EXCITED about this opportunity!  More to come later...

YEAH Buddy!!!

I’ve been in remission for two months!  What can I say, I’ve been feeling great!  AND something HUGE happened to me this week…talk about a dream come true!  J-dub and a few other peeps know what I’m talking about…GET BETTER J-DUB!  I’ll blog about it when the time is right!  All I have to say is, y’all better check out the Vanderkitten website.  J-dub introducted me to Vanderkitten via Mandy’s blog, and the second I went to the VK website I was hooked!  Their clothing is catchy and HOT, and their jerseys are definitely the  HOTTEST I've ever seen.  I have never, EVER seen such awesome cycling clothing for women.  Vanderkitten is doing GREAT things for women’s cycling.  VK shows women that it is OK to be hot, sassy, feisty, and cute all while being CRAZY FAST on the bike.  Check out their website and their team standings.  These women kick ass.  More to come later…

 I was able to talk to my hubby this week for the first time in over a month.  That was nice, just a little over two months before he’ll be home!  YEAH!

 I did my first three hour ride in quite a while this past week.  It was awesome!  I’ve learned that it takes my body a few days to recover from a long ride like that.  That’s okay though, at least I was able to do it!  It was all rolling (I LOVE THE HILLS OUT HERE), and I felt pretty strong.  It’s been a long time since I’ve been on such a challenging ride.  I would say the last ride I’ve had like this was when I was a junior at the boat school.  On Friday a Ukranian guy I met while riding asked me if I had trouble getting up in the morning to ride (you have to get up between 0430-0500 to be on the road by 0530 to beat the heat out here).  I told him that getting up early hasn’t been an issue for me.  I am excited to ride.  I love riding and usually can’t wait to get to bed the night before so I can ride the following morning.  I know what it’s like to not be able to ride due to illness, and I’m not taking any chances or taking riding for granted.  Nope, never take riding for granted.  I take every opportunity to ride and savor every minute of it.  Nothing comes close to cycling.  Nothing.  Call me obsessive, but if you’re not a cyclist, you won’t understand.

 It’s awesome seeing how strong I’ve gotten over the past two months.  I started out only being able to spin easy for thirty minutes at a time, to struggling ridiculously on the hills (and I'm a climber), to now crushing the hills and going on three hour rides!  I am thankful for this, and continue to thank God for my blessings!  My body may not recover as quickly as it used too before getting sick, but hell, I’ll be wiped out for three days…it’s worth the beauty of a LONG HILLY ride!  If you’re wondering what my body does after a long ride, I’ll tell you.  The afternoon after a long ride I usually end up pooing a lil bit of mucous and a lil bit of blood, nothing to be too alarmed over (considering the amount of blood I’ve lost in the past while pooing).  To counter this I take lots of naps (it took me a while to get used to sleeping in the middle of the day), drink my wheatgrass, and eat well.  But the key to it all is plenty of rest.  It’s taken me over two years to listen to my body, but I think I’ve (almost) got it figured out.  I haven’t been able to go on such challenging long rides since getting diagnosed, so this is still a learning process for me.  I’m figuring it out though, and will hopefully cause some serious pain to chicks in WA State next year during racing season!  YEAH BUDDY!

We're Movin'!!!

It's official folks!  Matt and I are moving to WA State!  We are both extremely excited!   The cycling out there rocks, it is a great outdoorsy state, there are plenty of organic crazy peeps there, and the biggest Nordstrom in the country is in Seattle (not to mention there is a Chanel boutique inside the Nordstrom)!  Yes!  I mean, seriously, it doesn't get any better than this!  I'm totally stoked.  Whoo-hoo!!  =-)~ 

Whoa-Whoa-Wee-Wow

Great news!  My Gastro doc says after my prednisone taper I am DONE with the ‘roids.  Finally!   

I had my Remicade infusion and saw my doc on Friday.  I definitely wasn’t looking forward to my infusion b/c I was worried I was going to get stuck with a needle like 5+ times.  Because I have been stuck so many times in the past two years my veins now harden and roll or they conveniently “magically” disappear when they know the needle is near.  It’s absolutely amazing what the subconscious-self can do.  I mean, mentally I don't think it’s a big deal, but apparently my subconscious-self does.  The damn thing has a mind of it’s own  and as a result, my veins disappear.  It’s freakin’ amazing.  Take Thursday for example.  I was looking at the veins in my arms and saw a few good potentials.  Conveniently enough, as I was sitting in the comfy La-Z-Boy Recliner in the Ambulatory Infusion Center Friday morning, they were nowhere to be seen.  Interesting. 

 Anyway, the nurse successfully poked a vein in my hand on the first try and the rest is history!  Thank goodness!  My Remicade aka Mouse Juice aka Jerry Juice (as Clarice calls it) was doubled this time around, so hopefully my body will stay in remission once off the 'roids.  So, if I look extra Jerry-ish it’s b/c I have double the mouse antibodies flowing through my veins.  And no, I’m not joking!  I’m a little fatigued and my body is a little out of whack right now, but I think its b/c the medicine is doing its thing.  Cleaning out the bad and healing the wounds.

 After my infusion I saw my Gastro Doc.  As I ever so excitedly announced above, after I taper down from the ‘roids this time I am done with the prednisone.  He is concerned for my bones as well as my eyes.  I guess if you’ve been on prednisone for quite a while it can start affecting your eyes.  I’m just glad that instead of me making my own decision to be off the ‘roids (we all know how that went), my Doc put his foot down and said no more.  It’s a relief.  Trust me.  So, this news is, as Borat would say, “Great Success!” 

 If for some reason I do start flaring again, my meds are getting switched and I’m getting another colonoscopy b/c he wants to check my mucosa and just reaffirm that there isn’t anything shady going on in there.  My doc spoke about possibly putting me on Humira or Methotrexate.  He also said he would write me a referral to the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota.  So, like anything else with this beast, we’ll just wait and see what my body decides to do.  Of course I want more than anything to stay in remission. 

 I flew back to AZ early this morning (THANX DAVID FOR TAKING ME TO THE AIRPORT AT 0430)!  Actually I want to give much love to David, my super awesome neighbor, who put up with my crazy paranoia and silly self.  I also want to thank Barb, who is not only one of my best friends, but my pseudo mama!  You guys are great!  I was only in VA for a few days, but the days were great and well spent.  Yes, even my long day at the hospital on Friday wasn't that bad because things got accomplished and a lot of questions were answered. 

 I’m not planning on going back to VA until mid September for my next treatment cycle, so I’m going to be livin’ it up in AZ, and doing a lot of riding.  Until next time my friends!

One Month and Counting...

Great Success!  I am absolutely ecstatic to announce that I have now been in remission for a little over a month!  And yes, I have been taking full advantage of the fact that I am feeling great.  I have ridden my bike so much this past month, it’s been absolutely awesome.  The cycling in Arizona has been phenomenal, and I can't wait to get back so I can ride some more!  I had to leave AZ on Tuesday to fly back to VA for my eight week “maintenance” Remicade Infusion and to see my Gastro doc.  If it was my choice I wouldn’t leave AZ, but I have to get my mouse juice and get some answers from my doc!  For those of you wondering why I couldn’t just get my infusion in AZ, it’s not that easy.  Remicade is extremely expensive and I can’t just switch Gastro docs.  As you know, my case is extremely complicated and I wouldn’t be getting the best care possible if I switched docs for six months.  So, I am going to fly back and forth to get my treatments until my hubby and I move in November (we still don’t know where we’re going yet but I’ll post as soon as I know).

 I am now on 20mg of prednisone (originally started on 40mg) and have been tapering down by 5mg a week.  As soon as I got on the ‘roids I went into remission, but can’t keep up this cycle.  I love the ‘roids (this time around) because it gave me my life back.  My last flare made me so miserable, I was desperate to take anything that worked.  Thanx to the ‘roids I can ride my bike, workout, not be a slave to the commode, not have to worry about having to cancel plans, etc etc.  I am grateful that my body (most of the time) responds to the prednisone, but am sad at the same time because in the past, 3-6 weeks after taperng, I usually relapse.  This has been the never-ending cycle for the past two years and it has gotten very, very old.  I feel great for the few months I’m on the ‘roids and then once off the ‘roids am back to square one.  I just want to be healthy without the use of prednisone and I DO NOT want the vicious cycle to repeat itself this time.  I’m being optimistic that this time will be different...

 I guess the most difficult aspect of being on predisone is that after I’ve taken it for about a month I have days that I look in the mirror and don’t recognize my own face.  It’s hard. About a week ago my sis commented on how my “now” face looked completely different from my wedding picture “then” face taken three years ago.  Well, unfortunately the 'roids will do that to ya.  They make your face puffy.  I feel like freakin marshmallow man and the damn ‘roids create a “moon face.”  After tapering off the ‘roids my face always returns to “normal,” but I don't exactly know what "normal" is for me anymore.  I’m on and off the ‘roids so much that I never have one set “normal” face.  People that have only known me for a few months prob would only recognize me with the moon face, while those who have known me the entire time I’ve had Crohn’s (and before) can tell when I’m off the ‘roids, and when I’m back on the ‘roids.  Arg!  I just want some form of stability.  To be consistent for once. I honestly believe it’s coming, I can feel it.  I’ve never felt as stable as I am now, so I hope things are once and for all working out.  I guess I’ll just have to wait and see…

 My mouse juice infusion is early Friday morning and I see my doc Friday afternoon.  Doc Smith (the most awesomest Gastro doc alive) is doubling the dosage of my Remicade in an attempt to keep my body in remission once I’m off the ‘roids.  I have a little under a month left on the ‘roids, so the true test will be once I’m tapered.  I’m keeping the faith, but get a little frustrated at times.  I know it’s all about patience.  Like I’ve said before, patience is definitely something this disease has taught me. 

As long as I can keep riding my bike, I don’t care what happens.  I want to get off the ‘roids, and I desperately want Remicade to work, but through it all I just want to continue the consistent riding that I’ve been fortunate enough to partake in the past month.  Riding has been so, SO therapeutic for me.  When I ride, I don’t have Crohn’s.  Riding is my time to think, to question, to believe that things will get better soon.  Riding gives me the self-confidence and self esteem that the predisone once took away (I had a hard time adjusting to the moon face and “puffy” body).  When I ride, I question my diagnosis.  Sure, I have been diagnosed with Crohn’s and based off of my two year struggle know that the disease is very active in my body.  I know it is a serious auto-immune illness, I get it.  But just because my body is attacking my digestive tract at this time in my life doesn’t mean I’m going to have it for the rest of my life.  I know science has proven otherwise, but ya know what, who says things can’t change.  Science has been wrong before.  Stranger and more mysterious things have happened.  I am refusing to accept the fact that I will have to struggle with this illness for the rest of my life.  Right now, yes, it’s an awful roller coaster.  But if I give up, and accept the fact that for the rest of my life (I’m 26) I’m going to be living with this, then that is exactly what will happen.  As René' Descartes once said,  “Cogito ergo sum” aka "I think, therefore I am." 

 Listen, I’m not in some fantasy world.  I fully understand the fact that I could possibly have Crohn’s for the rest of my life.  I get that.  And if that’s how it’s going to be, then so be it.  But I’m not going to just accept that fact that I’m going to have it for the rest of my life because medical science and docs tell me so.  I’m going to live it for myself, and keep the faith.  This, my friends, is why I ride.  Because riding gives me my life back.  Riding gives me hope.  Because when I ride, my Crohn’s disappears.  Every time I sweat, I’m killing my Crohn's.  I’m not allowing it to control me.  I’m fighting this beast, and have full confidence that I will come out ahead, even if it takes years.

 

 

He's BACK...

Marshmallow man, that is.  Like they say, "Never say never!"  Well, last Friday (oddly enough Friday the 13th) I was so completely miserable that I had to go back on prednisone.  Yes, yes, and yes I KNOW it was only two days after I had sworn off the 'roids forever.  I really wanted to stay off of prednisone for good, but I reached a point in my illness where there was no other option.  I talked with the docs and there is absolutely no way I can start Humira until the 18th of July, which is when my next Remicade infusion is due, b/c I guess it's bad to mix toxins (who woulda thought). =-)~

SO, predisone was my only option, and to be honest, I was desperate and glad to take the tiny white pills.  I mean, I had a permanent headache and had been overwhelmingly nauseous for the past two weeks.  I was miserable.  My quality of life was non-existent.  I was miserable just sitting on the couch.  It was miserable to eat, sleep, think, poo (duh)...  Words cannot describe how I felt.  Ill, sick, weak, miserable.  So, as you can imagine, it didn't take a whole lot of convincing from the docs to get me to take the 'roids again.  I was glad to take them.  My only fear was that they wouldn't work to their full potential because they didn't do a great job keeping me in remission during my last flare up.  

The docs wanted me to start on 40mg, which made me giggle, b/c I was sure that 40mg wouldn't cut it.   I mean, last time 60mg didn't cut it.  Well, I did as I was told.  I grabbed the ugly orange prednisone pill holder, opened the lid, and stared at the tiny white pills.  Lil' bastards.  Well, there comes a time in your life when you just say, "F*** it" and hope it works.  Well, I put the nasty tasting pills in my hands, thought to myself, "Here's lookin' at you kid" and freakin downed the two 20mg tablets.  What happened thirty minutes later was a complete surprise...

Thirty minutes after taking the 'roids I felt GREAT.  I had my life back.  I was actually able to go to dinner with my siblings and not feel like I was going to vomit (I went to dinner the night before with my sis and couldn't eat because of the nausea).  On Saturday morning I woke up feeling pretty well and went to a baseball game (see the Diamonbacks and Jesus post).  The rest of the week, should I say, has been great!

I have been so active this past week, it's like night and day from the previous two weeks.  On Monday I swam laps, rode my bike on Tuesday, went to (my first) spin class on Wednesday, and had my first personal training session today.  Yesterday I even had an epic poo.  It was seriously the best looking poo I've had in a LONG time.  I'm not going to go into details, but with Crohn's, one very rarely has a perfectly formed poo with no associated "collateral damage" aka blood.  

Tomorrow I taper down to 35mg and will taper 5mg each Friday thereafter until I am completely off the 'roids.  I'm taking full advantage of feeling great at this time, because with a chronic illness one never knows when their body is going to decide to revolt and throw them back into a deep, dark hole of miserableness and uncertainty.  I'm keeping the faith though.  This damn disease hasn't beaten me yet, and I guarantee you it never will.  

I'll keep y'all posted on my health status, but can assure you that I am on a roll.  I hired a personal trainer for the next three months to help me strengthen my bones so I can offset the side effects of the prednisone (osteoporosis is a big one).  Being that I already have osteopenia in my spine, I can't take any chances.  I also plan on riding, riding, riding, especially since I now feel GREAT.  I may be back on the steroids, but for now, they have given me my life back and I'm going to take full advantage of that.  

I find it kinda comical that I was swearing off prednisone for good, and then two days later desperately taking them (I was desperate to take anything that would make me feel better).  This just reflects the roller coaster of this disease, and that is why I've created this blog.  I've created it so you can take the journey with me, and I hope my experiences will somehow help you with your own life struggles.  Until next time my friends...

Diamondbacks and Jesus

Yesterday we went to an Arizona Diamondbacks game.  As we were approaching Chase Field we ran into the nice man pictured above, spreading the word of Jesus!  I was surprised yet happy at the same time.  He took the time to stand in front of the ballpark in scorching heat and spread

the word.  Anyway, I don't know his name, but if you read this, leave a comment!

As for the rest of the game...

I think this picture sums it all up!  We had a great time at the game and my sis and I had an even greater time harassing Clarice.  The last time I went to a Diamondbacks game (or baseball game for that matter) was during college, when they got beat by the Washington Nationals.  

Anyway, the Diamondbacks lost again last night, but who cares!  Clarice, my sis and I had a great time!  I guess we don't fall under the category of hard core fans...

We met some friendly people.  Definitely NOT the candy man-he was a grade A @sshole!  We did meet Mr. Lemonade man pictured below.  He had the personality all venders should have if they want to sell anything.  Candy man wasn't nearly as cool as this dude, no wonder his freakin' box was full and he couldn't sell anything!

My siblings and I enjoyed the game (though we didn't watch much of it).  This has been the first time in years we've all gotten together (alone) for some sort of event.  We are all so much alike it's RIDICULOUS!  For instance, my sis and I are both Chanel junkies and own a lot of the same Chanel stuff w/ out even realizing it.  And Clarice, good ole Clarice...well if he was a girl he would own Chanel stuff too.  He's got great style though, so that counts.  Anyway, I have a feeling this is the first of many games we'll attend (when we're all in the same place).  I love you guys!!!  I had a GREAT time guys, love ya!!

Love You, Love Bug

My husband is absolutely awesome!  Yesterday was our three year anniversary.  Though he is across the world he managed to call me and send me beautiful flowers!  Both were quite a treat, and definitely a nice surprise.

Family and friends know exactly why this was such a treat.  For the rest of ya, use your imagination, but it's not going on my blog!  

My Matt, if you get a chance to read my blog, know that I Love You and miss you very much!I  You are, after all, My Love Bug. =-)~

Farewell Marshmallow Man...

  

Prednisone.  I just can't do it anymore.  Look, I'm all about being positive.  I rarely let this disease get me down.  But, I'm going through a funk at the moment.  Not only have I been ridiculously nauseous these past two weeks, but I've also had a permanent headache.  Just when I think the damn thing is gone it pops up again, kinda like a permanent stalker.

My flares are starting to get worse, and I'm starting to get a little frustrated.  I tapered off the 'roids a few weeks ago.  Let me give you a little history on my relationship with prednisone.  It's always been a love/hate relationship.  When I was diagnosed two years ago I was given prednisone for the first time.  About 3-6 weeks after tapering, I started flaring again.  Thus began my dependency (and love/hate relationship) on prednisone.  Basically I would be on the 'roids for a little over four months, taper, and about 3-6 weeks later, relapse.  This has been the vicious cycle that has repeated itself for the past two years.  

The "love" part of my prednisone relationship (or should I say addiction) was that it (until recently) had always kicked me into remission the day after taking it.  It also kept me from flaring 3-6 weeks after tapering.  The "hate" part was the side effects.  I always felt like marshmallow man, turned into psycho lady, gained weight, looked like a chipmunk, lost hair, became nocturnal, etc etc.  Oh, and it also gave me osteopenia in my spine.  I didn't really mind the side effects so much (besides the osteopenia), b/c prednisone temporarily gave me my life back.  I could ride as much as I wanted, and pretty much do whatever I wanted without the fear of having  a flare-up.  It's nice being "normal" every once in awhile...but that leads to my next question, what exactly is "normal?"  I guess it varies from person to person.  Or so I'm learning.

Well, my love/hate relationship with prednisone is over.  My body has built up an immunity to it and prednisone is no longer able to fully keep my body in remission.  It took me almost three weeks being on a high dosage of steroids to kick me into full remission.  Three weeks before I tapered off the 'roids I started relapsing.  This has never happened to me.  But, in a way, I am relieved.  My relationship with prednisone is now over.  For good.  

I am currently on Remicade aka Mouse Juice, and it's not doing it's job.  The next step, according to my doc, is putting me on Humira.  Humira is very similiar to Remicade, the only difference is that Remicade is made of mouse antibodies (yes I have actual mouse flowing through me veins, not many people can say that)!  In contrast, Humira is made up of human antibodies, vice mouse antibodies.  Humira is given by injections whereas Remicade is given by infusion (thank goodness no more infusions...my veins can't take much more)!  

I don't want to leave AZ early to go back to VA for the sole fact that I'm flaring.  I've only been here two weeks!  I don't want to disrupt my visit with the 'rents and family because I'm having a flare.  I'm tired of having this disease get in the way of my life!  So, I am going to try some "mental toughness" (thanx Wayno!!) to fight this beast.  My doc would naturally want me to start prednisone again, because that has been the pattern for so long, but I am unwilling, especially since it doesn't quite work for me anymore.  And I've been on it for too long.  My body is tired, and it's not worth it.  I want to prove the impossible.  I want to show my doc (and myself) that I can fight this flare and kick myself into remission.  The hard part for me is being extra careful in everything I do.  That includes not pushing myself too hard on the bike (I tend to be a competitive meat head, so this should be interesting).  BUT I can be disciplined and not push it, especially if it helps me get better once and for all.  

When I get back to VA in July I will more than likely be put on Humira.  I really hope it works, but if not, I will go on Methotrexate.  If that doesn't work, off to the Mayo Clinic I go.  The Mayo Clinic in Minnesota specializes in Crohn's Disease when conventional medicine has failed. 

The positive side of all of this is that each flare teaches me something valuable about life.  Getting sick has shown me just how much I rely on my bike to keep some normalcy in my life.  I can have episodes before and after riding, but never have the urge to have an episode while on the bike.  Perhaps it's because riding has a strong healing affect on me.  Who knows.  All I know is that I want to get back to racing...as Randy Pausch once said, "An injured lion wants to know if he can still roar" (in my case lioness). =)  

It will be done, so stay tuned.  I'm not giving up this easily.  I can survive without "the juice."  Some medical experts may not think so, but I know so.  It's my body, and I will overcome.  I will give y'all updates, so wait and see.  And to you, awful Predisone, I'm glad you're now out of my life...for good.  No more marshmallow man.  Finally.